Should’ve Learned That

But Probably Didn’t

Have you ever heard the phrase “You should’ve learned this”? I have too. I hate this saying. Hate is a strong word however, I feel it is appropriate for this phrase. The phrase “you should’ve learned it” assumes that everyone was taught the same way, learns the same way, and remembers the same way. It’s not very fair since we are human and not robots. We are not all programed that same way, we can’t be expected to know everything automatically. Being able to be programmed and have the capability to upload information be nice but that’s not how real life operates.

In school, teachers would skip over lessons “because you should remember this from last year” or “we’ll cover it next year” and then you don’t. And to me, it seems like it happens to us as adults. You should know what taxes are and how to pay them. You should know how to balance a check book. And even more basic than that; you should know how to dress properly or conduct a hygiene routine properly.

Should've Learned That
But you don’t. Hell, I don’t. Because we should’ve already learned it. Teachers assume your parents teach you basic life lessons and your parents assume the teachers are teaching you economics and business. It’s like going from grade to grade learning more advanced lessons without knowing the basics.

I know for my own life story, my mother was too busy being a single mother, working, taking care of my sister and myself and trying to keep us active, that teaching even something as basic as picking out clothes slipped through the cracks. It happens with us all, that’s why I’m trying to fill in the gaps. Everyone’s life story is different. You probably learned something that I was never taught or vise versa.

Without the Basics

Without knowing the basics, this is where life gets hard. This is where you become afraid because you know that’s what people will say; “you should’ve learned this”. Then you get angry because you’re afraid because life is hard. Then you don’t do anything about your life because you’re angry because its’ hard because there is no basic foundation.

This understanding took me a very long time to figure out. I just couldn’t understand why. Why was my life not advancing the way I envisioned it? Why were my friends’ pros at making a schedule and sticking to it? How the hell in the world did people accomplish so much? Everyone has the same 24 hours so why are my wheels spinning in place? And I finally realized I was trying to run a marathon without even knowing how to walk.

I know I’m not the only one who feels like this. That’s why I want to help anyone I can. This feeling of confusion leading into anger is just a terrible feeling. And if we only get one life, I don’t want to be angry because I never learned a basic life function. And I don’t want you (my readers) to have to feel like this anymore. It sucks. I want us to enjoy the only life we’ve got and that time starts now.

the road to success by learned behavior

With this Blog

This blog will focus on helping you learn the basics and maybe try things you’ve never thought to before. There’s so many aspects of life that need to be explored and understood, and as long as we have the basics in place we can only succeed. And I honestly can’t wait to experience it with you.

For myself I know I would like to learn the proper form of exercises, hygiene routines, dressing properly, and creating a morning/evening routine. But even beyond the basics I would love to learn more about how to manage student loans, money, time, friends and hobbies.

I also won’t hold anything back. I will not only explain how to do it but what I like about it and what sucked about it; the pros and cons. Because there is some small part of everything we try to do that does suck. I will also be explaining the big question I always ask, which is WHY.

I always ask why because without knowing the why, I know at least for me; I’ll probably stop doing it. I am human, I probably won’t complete a task unless I know the why, or an even better motivator: the benefits. Knowing why makes the task easier. Easier to understand and easier to accomplish.

That sounds kind of selfish but it is how we operate. Even volunteering, we research what we sign up to volunteer for. Granted we don’t get direct benefits from volunteering but we do get the sense of pride from helping, that’s a benefit in itself. I want to help you live as efficiently as possible so if you wanted, you could in turn help friends and family or even future children.
I am also open to suggestions about what you would like to learn, or comments about how you complete a task. I also want to know how you learn and remember because there are different ways information can be translated.

New Topics for Life

And please begin to keep an open mind. There are hobbies and cultures that I would’ve thought that I would never like. Now, I can’t live without utilizing the knowledge I’ve obtained because I would miss it too much. So on top of learning how to life, I will introduce you to things that maybe you’ve never even considered learning about like games, hobbies, or maybe a clothing company you never knew existed.

I love researching, exploring and trying new things. I am a scientist by trade, so I will give you as much information on a topic I possibly can. I will also include other information to refer you to for even more places that can help you learn.

There are a lot of very talented writers out there. The information is available but it might be difficult to find.

So I will get off of my soapbox now and begin the journey to learning how to navigate life. And at least for this post I would like to steal what my sister and her fiancé use as a base of their relationship; “We got this”.

Why I would always choose Slytherin

The world of Harry Potter is amazing. I have loved reading the books ever since I was eleven and picked up “Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone”. This book series actually helped me learn to read and actually make me want to read which is something I will always be grateful for. And just like I’m sure most of you have, I have done countless Harry Potter sorting hat quizzes both on and off Pottermore. For the majority of the time I get Slytherin as my house, with a couple of Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws mixed in.
However, one part of the book always stands out to me: When Harry is getting sorted and asks not to be put into Slytherin. Part of me does get upset at the prejudice the house faces but the main point I try to take away is that, the sorting hat takes Harry’s feelings into account. Just like in life, you can choose who you become. So if I was up at the front of the Great Hall getting sorted (still waiting on that letter McGonagall), instead of asking the hat “not Slytherin, not Slytherin” I would say “please Slytherin!” and here’s why:

1) Cunning. The definition of cunning is: dexterous or crafty in the use of special resources (such as skill or knowledge) or in attaining an end – Merriam Webster. This does not necessarily mean cunning people are evil or deceitful. To me it means that anything you have in your arsenal of knowledge, whether it is book knowledge, art knowledge, social knowledge, etc. You have the capability of using it to face any task. That you have the ability to change and adapt according to your settings, goals, or who you’re around to still meet your end goal. I think that’s pretty amazing. And sure, people who are cunning may do bad things but that’s more on a person-to-person basis. It’s how you choose to use your ability that alters how you’re perceived.

2) Resourcefulness. Using anything, materialistic or not, to achieve your goals. I really like this trait. Being resourceful has allowed me to look into different aspects of life that I probably would’ve have tried or even known about. I’ve learned a little bit of everything from different art styles to doing electrical work and everything in between. Like a ‘jack of all trades’ I know a little bit of everything. This has really helped me not only to expand my mind and test the limits of what I can perform but also it has given me knowledge to apply to other situations. For example, my background in art has really helped me at work with gram-staining microorganisms. The cross-overs from different aspects of life that I would’ve never thought applicable in my own, have actually come in quite handy. It is also helpful to have these types of knowledge to connect with people that I would otherwise have nothing in common with.

3) Ambition. This is one trait I am working really hard to have become a habit; living with intent. Living to achieve. I am obsessed with trying to make my way up in the world. I love BossBabe posts or how to become a boss. It’s so inspiring and motivating. I love trying to improve my life and be happy. Having ambitions and goals give me a rush of excitement. Something to look forward to and strive for. The best part is, it doesn’t have to be anything big. Yes some of the time it’s wanting to conquer the world, but other times, it’s defeating a boss in a video game or finishing that book before your X days of work or school. Having ambitions to try new hobbies or food. Ambition to do anything that you want to in life.

Slytherin mask

Those are just the traits that are mentioned in the books. I feel (just like with the other houses) there are so many other things that define this house. To feel powerful, being organized, being self-reliant, and keeping some of your life private; I really could go on and on but I’ll stop there. I also love the courage that pretending in my head that in I’m Slytherin gives me. Especially when I have to give presentations and I’m trembling in my head but have a calm cool exterior on the outside, trying to do my house proud. Also the courage to not change my goals based on who I surround myself with, to not give into fear, to be the symbol of the snake eating its tail; creation out of destruction, the eternal cycle of renewal. Sorry, I did say I wouldn’t go on, I lied.
No hate on any of the other houses, I admire a lot of their traits as well. The courage, playfulness and honor of Gryffindors. The creativity, wit, and wisdom of Raveclaws. The loyalty, non-prejudice, hard-working, patient Hufflepuffs. All these traits are to be admired. However, I am a Slytherin, I choose to be a Slytherin, and will always choose to be a Slytherin.

Please let me know which house you would choose to be in, I would love to know!